Nothing to Fear but Fear Itself

These words are a paraphrase of remarks made by Franklin Delano Roosevelt at his first presidential inauguration. Those were difficult times, recovering from the Great Depression and with a World War looming on the horizon. One could argue that back then there was a lot to actually fear.

Aside from how our anxieties affect us at work, school and in relationships, I regularly see how fear plays an outsized role in the realm of physical fitness.

I have worked with many clients with a variety of fears: fear of doing a certain exercise, fear of entering in a 5K, fear of looking foolish in the gym, fear of disappointing their trainer, etc. This can often be paralyzing. It can prevent us from engaging in the fitness activities that can help us to avoid the kinds of injuries and illnesses that we should legitimately fear.

I know that every time I have competed in a race (obstacle course, 1/2 marathon or triathlon), my overwhelming emotion beforehand is fear. I am afraid that I won’t finish the race, or that I might hurt myself, or that I will do so poorly that I will be a disappointment to myself or others. It is irrational since none of these have ever happened, but still it occurs.

As someone who has dealt with anxiety and even panic attacks, I know that this fear can prevent us from living a life of adventure, fulfillment and even love. There comes a time, though, when we have to take an informed and prepared leap of faith. I wouldn’t say that a person should conquer their fear of running a 5K by waking up one morning to do one; it requires preparation and training. The process of getting ready can help give us the confidence to overcome our anxieties.

We should be aware of the crippling role that fear can play in our lives. We must remind ourselves of how strong and courageous and deserving of good things we are. We must also work hard to reach our goals. Accept the fear. Stare it down…and then set it aside. The only thing we have to fear…is truly fear itself.

What Moves You to Act?

Parashat Bo–the Torah Portion read yesterday morning–contains the last of the 10 Plagues that God visited upon the Egyptians. The last, the death of the first born of both human and beast, was the most devastating of all of them; it was the plague that finally convinced Pharaoh to let the Hebrews go.

Much interpretation has been written about the final plague. It is clear that this plague personally touched Pharaoh and his family. All the previous plagues may have affected the rest of the Egyptians, but Pharaoh’s powerful position may have prevented him from their full force. With the death of the first born, not a house in Egypt did not experience the loss–including Pharaoh’s palace.

There is a recognizable truth in this. We know that often we are not moved until something touches us directly. We may hear about injustice or war or suffering, but we don’t do anything about it if we are not affected by it. If it comes knocking at our door, however, we are the first to step up, complain, and act.Judaism teaches us that we cannot take this approach. We must remember our experience as outsiders to feel what others feel and act accordingly. This is called “having empathy.” It is something that Pharaoh seemed to lack. It is something that is often missing in our society as well. It is found at every level; unless we are somehow inconvenienced or aggrieved we are silent.

The price for not acting is a high one. When we do not stand up for others, when we do not feel what they feel…we cannot expect them to do the same for us. Setting that aside, wee stand up for others because it is the right thing to do? It is our sacred duty to be empathic. We know it means to suffer, and we should work to prevent others from having to experience it as well.

Know Your Numbers and…

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to hear a registered dietitian, Robin Rood, give a presentation about diets at the Mandel JCC to our Big Weight Loss Challenge participants. I was curious as to the content of the presentation since I had not been one of the organizers of the event, and discussing diets can be a tricky thing.

Robin went over a number of different diets, explaining what they are, the science behind them, as well as the pros and cons. This was informative for most of the crowd. There is a lot of talk out there about various diets and it is difficult to know what they are and which is the best.

What Robin emphasized to us from the beginning was that not every diet is right for everyone. It is important for us to know our numbers. By that she meant not just our weight, but our blood pressure and blood sugar. Knowing where there are imbalances in our systems should guide us to the diet that is most appropriate if we seek to trim our body fat percentage.

Numbers aren’t the only thing we need to consider. She cautioned us to also be aware of family medical history. If there is a history of diabetes or coronary disease, that will have bearing on which diets are even safe to try. Certain diets are risky for those with a history of eating disorders (like intermittent fasting). Having the history and the numbers can narrow down the choices quite a bit.

The overall message was that the most effective way to find a healthy way to eat is to know ourselves first. We need to know our numbers, our health history, and even our own emotions and shortcomings. We know what we are capable of doing and what will be too difficult.

Of course, diet is only part of maintaining a healthy lifestyle. Robin shared with us as well the importance of exercise, getting enough rest/sleep, and finding ways to de-stress.

Choosing a diet isn’t as easy as selecting what a certain celebrity is doing, or what you’ve heard about on the news, or even seen in a magazine. It is a personal decision….and how you choose will determine your success and your overall health too.

The Struggle is Real…difficult

Parashat Va-era contains the beginning of the process of our ancestor’s liberation from Egyptian slavery. The end of the portion is comprised of the first plagues God visited on our oppressors.

Va-era and the following two portions are filled with miracles that accompany the Exodus from Egypt. Modern readers often wonder if the events described really happened. Did the Nile turn to blood? Were there frogs everywhere, etc.? And was it possible that these natural disasters only struck the Egyptians and not the Israelites? Scholarly papers have been written that seek to explain the plagues from an epidemiological standpoint. A few of them are rather convincing; there are plausible explanations for how it started and how one plague naturally followed after the other.

But do we really need to understand exactly how the plagues occurred? Do we even need to believe that the stories contained in these Torah portions (or any others for that matter) really happened?

The miraculous nature of the story does not require historical or scientific verification. Ultimately, what is most important is the underlying message: the difficult path from oppression to liberation. This story is not just about the Exodus from Egypt. It is about the constant quest for justice and freedom in our world. Bringing redemption to our world is never easy; it doesn’t occur overnight. And there are times when we reach a milestone–where some wrong is righted or some injustice recognized–and feel that the moment is beyond just us. There is something “miraculous” about it…or a sense that a higher source somehow intervened.There are those who take the story literally, but for those who don’t, there is still the valuable lesson about the work it will take to redeem our far from perfect world.

Shabbat Shalom!

Labels Stick (double-entendre)

I am re-posting a post from my brother, Joel, on LinkedIn. We grew up in a home where athleticism wasn’t really a thing. Don’t think my mom every worked out–aside from walking. My dad used to swim, but not real heavy duty. Now my sister, brother and I are all gym regulars.

I never thought of myself as an athlete until a few years ago when my doctor referred to me as “athletic.” My brother encapsulates a lot of what I felt growing up and what the change has meant to him.

Enjoy!

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/really-im-athlete-joel-ungar/

The Difficult Climb Out

Many years ago I had the opportunity to visit the Majdanek Concentration/Death Camp in Poland. There is a huge sculpture that looks somewhat like a menorah that dominates the landscape. As visitors get closer, they see that there is a long sloping path that goes under the menorah; the way out is a steep set of rock stairs. The symbolism was to show how easy it was to slide into the situation that led to the Holocaust, and how difficult it was for those caught up in it to get out.

This week’s Torah portion reflects a similar idea. The process by which the Children of Israel came into slavery in Egypt looks somewhat quick and easy; it occurs over the course of just a few verses. The way out, however, took 400 years and a series of miraculous events. Even then, by the end of the Torah, the Israelites still had not reached the Promised Land. The contrast is striking.

Often in life we make decisions or take actions that are not well-thought out; we take the easy route instead of the right one. Sometimes the repercussions are not really consequential. Other times, though, we find ourselves entangled in webs from which we are not able to extract ourselves so easily. Parashat Shemot–and the many parashiyot that follow it–remind us that what may seem inconsequential now may end up being quite significant further down the road. It is up to us to see beyond the moment and think about the future.

Water…water…

The Weight Loss Challenge where I work is now in full swing. Last night was the first group fitness class offered by one of the other coaches. It was a big group and notable that many had not brought water with them. This is not a formula for success.

We hear a lot about keeping hydrated. We are not like camels who are able to store water for long periods and long distances. We use water to nourish our bodies and we lose water through sweating which helps to keep us cool. We must continually replenish. So what are the rules for water consumption with exercise?

Generall speaking the following guidelines apply:

2-3 cups of fluid 2 hours BEFORE the start of exercise
1 cup of fluid every 10-20 minutes DURING exercise
2-3 cups of fluid for every pound of body weight lost AFTER exercise

You’ll notice that I put “fluid” instead of “water.” Water is always excellent, but there are sports drinks that work as well. It is also better to drink something cool that something hot; this improves the speed of absorption. We also know that there are some liquids that actually accelerate dehydration: coffee and alcohol are two prime examples. This is not to say that you cannot have a glass of wine at dinner after exercising; just remember that this cannot be your primary form of hydration.

Dehydration is not pretty. It can lead to dizziness, loss of conscience, nausea and headaches. Bring a water bottle to the gym or to your class; this will help ensure that you are drinking enough.

Get your exercise on, but remember to get your hydration on as well!

When Values Clash…on Iran

This past week has been a very troubling one. The killing of Soleimani has heightened tensions with Iran. The circumstances of a Ukrainian airliner’s crash in Tehran are murky. Iran has targeted US bases in Iraq. It is a real morass.

There is little doubt that Soleimani was not a nice guy. There is little doubt that the Iranian regime is problematic at best. And yet, we worry about the possibility of an armed conflict and what it might mean for those who will have to fight it…as well as those who may get caught in the crossfire–including those in Israel.

I am reminded of my study of Talmud. The Talmud’s style is to ask every question imaginable (even those you could not imagine!). It debates each opinion and even itself. It digs deeper and deeper until we may forget the original question. Rabbis disagree with each other on issues of law and conduct. It is full of “on the one hand…and on the other hand.”

What is happening in the Middle East now (as always) is more complicated than it seems. Nothing is truly clear cut. It is difficult to know what the US Administration’s motives are. We cannot know what the Iranian regime is thinking. We do not know all the intelligence that is out there. We tend to follow whatever news source confirms what we already think from our own political or emotional perspective.

It is not easy to know what to think for certain…which is why the last week has felt like a dive into the Talmud for me. And why so many of us are so worried.

One thing that is clear from our tradition is that there are times when values may clash with each other. Sometimes there are two options that both seem right, or that both seem wrong. How do we know what to choose? How do we know what to believe? Judaism teaches us that when values come into conflict we must try to follow the example set by the students of Aaron the Priest: we must love peace and pursue it.

There are times when war is necessary. First, however, we must seek to avoid it all costs. If there is a way to save a life, it must be a priority. May our tradition guide us and our leaders through the rough waters ahead.

Shabbat Shalom!

Jews Standing Up for Ourselves…Because So Few Others Do

People hold signs of support near the house of Rabbi Chaim Rottenberg on December 29, 2019 in Monsey, New York. (Photo by Kena Betancur / AFP) — Photo Credit: Kena Betancur

This Sunday there will be a Solidarity March in New York; it is a response to the terrible wave of anti-Semitic violence taking place in our nation.
I remember when I was in Rabbinical School that I attended a march in Washington, DC, in solidarity with Soviet Jews. Little did we know at the time that communism would fall in a few years and that hundreds of thousands of Soviet Jews would be emigrating. I also recall participating in rallies in support of political and social justice causes that did not directly affect me but that I felt were important to our society. I even brought my kids with me or made sure they knew about it; this kind of behavior reflected some of the best of what Judaism teaches.
It seems so strange that after Jews (and the organized Jewish Community) have marched and rallied and lobbied for decades on behalf of others we must now join together in order to protect ourselves. I sincerely hope that just as we have stood up for others, others will stand up for us.
These are trying times. We cannot be silent. At the same time we cannot allow ourselves to be divided; this is precisely what anti-Semites want. We cannot accuse others within the Jewish community of supporting the “wrong” political party; our tradition tells us that this kind of behavior brought about the destruction of the Second Temple. We must focus on what unites us.
Unfortunately, I will not be able to make it to New York on Sunday. Rest assured, though, there will be many opportunities to stand up and stand together–not just for ourselves but for others who are persecuted as well. The struggle, I fear, is only just beginning.

How To Keep Your Fitness Resolution

Image result for new years resolution meme 2020

It is that time of the year. At gyms across the country, the “resolutionaries” are making their presence known…for the next few weeks anyhow.

If this is the year when you really want to work on a “new you,” remember that there is no such thing as a “new you.” At best, we can only hope for a better version of ourselves. Total transformations are rare; incremental long-term change is more realistic.

How can we best keep our resolutions? As I have blogged in the past, we should focus less on a weight we want to get to or a size we want to fit into. The emphasis should be on building a healthy lifestyle. When we focus on lifestyle, we are more likely to make a sustained change than simply starting a diet…and falling off of it in a week.

Another way to stick to the resolution to get healthier is to surround oneself with others who can give us positive encouragement or who are on the same journey as we are. That is why joining a gym is so popular…but it is important to take advantage of the professionals there to help build a program that is safe, effective and keeps us motivated. It is easy to give up if we feel we are in this alone.

Try to keep goals as specific as possible so that there is a way to measure success. “I will go to the gym” is not as effective as “I will go to the gym 3 times a week,” which is not as effective as “I will go to the gym on Monday, Wednesday and Friday before I go to work.” Create simple rules that are easy to stick by that are specific as well like: “no eating after dinner,” or “limit desserts to Friday and Saturday dinner only, ” etc. When we keep our goals fuzzy we have no way to really see if we are making headway. Even if we may not see the results in terms of weight loss, when we keep our gaols specific we will see that we are building a healthy lifestyle–which is the best for our health in the long run.

Finally, look back at past attempts to get healthy. Why did they fail? What were the obstacles? Take some time and strategize how to overcome them. If we realize that we are too tired to work out in the evening, figure out a better time to do it. If we always feel like we are in it by ourselves, find a friend or family member to engage in the journey too. We should not expect to do the same things that failed before over and over again and get different results. Plan ahead for success.

Wishing everyone a happy, healthy and fit 2020!